the yellow house on the hill.

I want to start fresh. To rebuild from the ground up and figure out exactly what kind of a woman I am.

I’ll be home in less than a week. But for now, I’m in my sisters apartment, watching the Antique’s Roadshow at 1:30am and now that I’ve started a new post, I’m not exactly sure what to say. Maybe just that painting is extremely relaxing and I really need to start running again.

It’s been an interesting past year. I’m looking back on it now, like you look at the earth from a plane. There are places that are interesting, maybe even exciting and others that are flat and neutral. It has all been rich and it has all shaped me and I am thankful for it all. I hold it up to the mirror that is my freshman year of college, almost four years ago now. They are nothing alike. The two cannot even be compared. I am alive, I am not in love and I am full of everything that makes a woman.

There are things that I am afraid of. Sometimes, I am afraid to look into the mirror and I hide from myself. I find myself trying so hard to be accepted, when I am just that – accepted. I convince myself that I must change everything about myself  in order to be loved, when I am more loved than I can imagine.

I should be writing those Music History final essays.

-EGE